the beginning of a realization

I consider myself a realist. Sometimes, while being the realist that I am, I am caught up in pretending to be a pessimist. You know, teen angst and stuff.  My natural nature however reverts me back to my secretive optimism and complete hopeless ramantism. See, I'd like to be cool like the rest of my peers and be too cool to care about anything, except about saving the planet by making my own compost. But the truth is, worms are gross, and so is the fact that I still have one year of highschool pretending to relate on some level with all those cookie- cutter teenagers of whom I am forced to be in contact with on a daily basis. And that is where my true natured optimism kicks in, telling me that there has got to be more than this. But the realist part of me brings to my attention that adults are always saying that highschool is the best years of your life. And if that is true, I'm screwed.